'We Can Be Nervous and Brave': First Bank CFO Elizabeth Bostian on Women in Leadership

Women in the workplace often have to deal with stereotypes about their behavior and performance, whether it’s that their edges are too sharp or that they’re too easily manipulated.

Elizabeth Bostian, chief financial officer of First Bank, said she’s faced those perceptions as she has made her way from the legal profession to banking, and it can be difficult to see past those images to make your own path.

Bostian spoke at a Women in Commerce luncheon Aug. 27, 2026, in Florence. First Bank recently acquired Florence-based First Carolina Bank.

Sometimes, a woman must adopt “a willingness to be misunderstood” in order to realize that her job isn’t about making everyone happy, Bostian said.

At the heart of this, Bostian said, is her own “recovery from being a lifelong people pleaser.”

In the workplace, women can be characterized as soft, indecisive, timid, or too accommodating. On the other side of the coin, they may be viewed as too harsh, “sharp-elbowed or shrill or unfeeling.”

Women, Bostian said, are judged on a different scale than men, and that can make it difficult to be taken seriously by subordinates. There’s always pressure to strike a balance, but finding that balance can be hard to achieve.

“The fact that I am helping run a bank today was not on anyone’s bingo card in my family or friends,” she said. “And that’s because I was too unwilling to be unliked.”

As a child, Bostian said, she was a shy, bookish girl, not a person who would be expected to shake up the business world.

“My family used to call me ‘the knife’ because I was the knife that spread the peanut butter and jelly together for everyone. I was tied with another girl from my class for Best Personality because I was friends with the cool kids and the nerds and everybody in between. … I have five godchildren, I’ve been a bridesmaid 15 times,” she said, adding that she wasn’t sharing the facts to brag, but rather to explain her personality.

Bostian said she leaned on that people-pleasing skill whenever she felt insecure.

“At some point, I started to realize that my motivations weren’t especially altruistic,” she said. “They were more self-focused. The main driver was to gain someone’s acceptance and approval, even more importantly, to avoid the hard feeling of being disliked.”

When Bostian joined First Bank, it was to run the bank’s legal department. With degrees in English and law, she hadn’t expected to work in the financial industry.

Then, five years ago, she was approached about the role of CFO.

“I was not asked to do this job for my financial acumen. … If our CEO and our board wanted the most astute, financially minded person, they would not have asked me. Thankfully, that’s not what they wanted. They knew I understood our business well and how we made money, and I’m a relatively quick learner,” she said.

What they needed, Bostian said, was a leader, and they saw that quality in her.

But there were questions, she said, including from the CEO, who asked if she could fire an entire department if needed. “He said, ‘I’m worried you’re too nice,’” Bostian said.

She replied that she could make that difficult decision if she knew it was the right choice for the company.

As Bostian became comfortable in her new role, it gradually became easier to make the tough calls, she said.

“They put me in this job for a reason. It’s not because I have all the answers. It’s because I’m willing to figure it out,” Bostian said.

A woman is made up of many facets, and each side of her personality is important, and vulnerability is just as crucial as other traits, she said.

“We can be two things at once. We can be nervous and brave, we can be excited and scared. It happens all the time. … Leading requires kindness and clarity, and decisiveness and empathy. If we remember to listen and to stay kind and be curious, we’ll be able to defend whatever position we take.”